Monday AM

Steve is still in bed, and I have a few minutes alone to post.
Yesterday was a really bad day for me.  I was deeply depressed and in quite a bit of pain all day.  I can't get used to the 'new' stomach and bowels I have, and I feel like I'm going to split in half if I move too much.  I've aged ten years in the last two months.  My skin hangs in sad wrinkles, my hair is listless and flat, and I feel sick and tired of being sick and tired.
I'm working on hats for the women and girls at Thompson Survival Center.  I'm making them a bit flamboyant and really colorful, as I feel that those women don't want to be ugly just because they're sick.  Doing this for others takes my mind off of my own troubles.  I'm totally absorbed when I'm arranging the flowers, feathers, beads, and bows on those hats, and it makes me feel good to think that I might be helping someone else in their struggles.  This is not an easy disease.
Steve is still being patient and so good.  He cooks, cleans, and even does the dishes after meals.  It's going to be hard for me to have to take over these tasks after being spoiled.  He already has this evening's meal planned.  I couldn't ask for better treatment. 
Aunt Kitty called yesterday afternoon after Mass to give me another blessing, and to ask after my health.  She's such a wonderful lady, and has given her whole life to God.  The Sisters in her Convent held a prayer vigil for me when I had surgery, and they still continue to pray for me.  A few of them have visited our home for a short retreat in the past, and I know them personally.  They're sure good people.  They are the Sisters of Saint Joseph of Rochester, New York.
Kathy Rose, a local friend, came by and brought me a yard flag of a snowman the other day.  She had told me that she didn't want to see it out in the yard, melting, in July, so I will need to keep it current with other flags in warm weather.  She's been so faithful to keep up with my progress and needs. 
Angie Slagle, our local stained glass artist, almost cut her hand off.  She was moving a picture that had a broken glass, which was in her shop for repairs, and the glass fell out of the frame, sliding down and cutting her on her wrist.  She is in quite a bit of pain with it, and is having a hard time with the forced inactivity.  I can sympathize with her on that.
She had designed and created the stained glass window in my music room.  I love it.
Both Marys call me often to keep in touch.  Mary Kelly is my oldest living sister, and Mary Douglass is my housekeeper for many years.  We have become like sisters.
It's hard for Mary to deal with my cancer problems, as she's just re-living the situation that she went through with Jack, our brother who died last summer with prostate cancer.  She loves her family, and when we suffer, she suffers right along with us.
I'm not doing much at Creekside right now, as I can't lift over ten pounds, stoop, bend, or squat.
I feel so limited, and the exhaustion is overwhelming.  Betty Pike had 'ordered' me to get some rest while I am recuperating, and I do rest some, but the pain keeps me restless and agitated.
I don't rest easy.
Stumpy is getting over her eye infection.  She's such an adorable little kitten, and I love for her to nestle and cuddle with me.  It's so amusing to watch her antics and see how she's growing.  She will come and find me, wherever I am in the house, and wants to be with me.  She climbs my gown-tail until I lift her up to snuggle my neck.  Her little claws are so sharp.
This is the time of the year when I should be restoring and re-painting my blow mold Christmas Nativity figures.  This sickness has so limited me.  I told Janie that we would likely be repairing the blow mold in the downstairs sun room in cold weather.  I'd much rather do it out in the yard, during warm, predictable weather.  I got another Santa last week, and he's in pretty good shape.  I sure love my blow mold.
Joan Stalsworth is back at work now.  She had been to the beach on vacation last week, and called often to see how I was doing.  She would have come to the hospital, but she doesn't drive in Knoxville.
I guess Janie will have to take me to most of my Chemo treatments, as Steve needs to get back out on the road soon.  He's a 'hands-on' manager, and wants to be active in his work.  I sure will miss all his help and the comfort he's given me.
He tests my blood sugar every morning.  It's been a little lower lately.
He's been trying to keep me on a better diet.
We have to go down to Fort Sanders Hospital today to do the preadmission paperwork for when the install my port for the chemo.  It will be one-day surgery, but they have to have all these reams of paperwork on all their patients, even though I was just there as a patient two weeks ago.
I think Steve is hedging towards Janie taking me.  He needs to be on his computer.
She drives like a New York cab driver, darting in and out of traffic and making obscene gestures at other drivers.  I've told her that, some day, some other driver is going to pull her out of the car and stomp her.  But she gets me there.
I don't know what I'd do without her.  She's been such a good friend, coming into my life later as she has, but we're bonded.  We have so much in common, and think alike on so many subjects.
She has been a God-send at Creekside.  She keeps things organised and picked-up, which is a great help.  I can trust her with money, and she has a set of keys to Creekside, so she can work without me having to be there.  She's good at finding things that need to be done.
John is still rather undependable, showing up when he wants to, and disapearing at other times.  I don't understand the mind-set that tells you that other people want to pay your bills and keep you up, but he apparently has latched onto it.  I believe he drinks pretty heavily, as he's been smelling of it lately almost every time he's been around.  He won't last long with me if that's going to be the case.
I saw Dirk and Riley Daniel at the garbage center last week, and Riley had a big hug for me.  She's a true darling, and so thin!  She's a bundle of energy, laughing and being fun all the time.  She has said that she wants to come and live with Miss Claire in Creekside when she grows up.  I'd like that, too.
She looks more like Lori than Dirk, with dark hair and eyes, and she looks like she would tan easily.  Dirk just burned and peeled when he was little.  The Daniels sure make good neighbors.
John came and cut the grass last week, and the yard looks much better.
Jaime Combs came and brought her mother, Dean, for a visit.  I was so glad to see them both.  Dean brought me a beautiful planter that looks like a metal cat with marble eyes.  I already had some cats with marbles for eyes, and that just ads to my collection.
Dean and Sam Combs have been such great friends.  Sam has a ribald sense of humor, and he and I get everyone red-faced and laughing every time we get together.  Jaime just rolls her eyes and grins when we get going.  I'm glad they came.  Dean is such a great mother, and I love older women, so she meets a need in me to see and love older women.  I love her, too, because she has given the world Jaime.  She is a great friend and adopted niece to me, always thoughtful and considerate.
Judy Lawson, my blood niece, has been wonderful through all this mess, too.  She goes to doctor's visits with us, and makes notes during the visit.  She is the busiest of Cecil's girls, but makes time for her old Aunt Claire.  I hope that Steve will not make trouble when I want to leave her something nice in my will.
I had intended to leave her my jewelry, which was of considerable value, but it's all been stolen in the house robbery last summer.  I'll be leaving her considerably less, but I want to give her something for all her goodness to me in my old age.  She's always been close to me, and she's always been my favorite.
Her father has gone back to his summer job, taking care of some camp ground, and now she has the responsibility of taking care of her grandmother, Opal Portwood.  She sometimes falls, and is becoming easily confused.  Judy told me lately that she calls her Cecil.  That's her mother.  It's sad to see such a goold old woman failing physically.  Opal was always so vigorus and healthy.  I've enjoyed many visits with her through the years.
I'd better mention Barbara.  She's covering the trials and travails of a bad judge that has been charged in federal court with 41 counts of mis-conduct and taking bribes, besides being the judge over trials of peole he was representing.  He's from neighboring Hawkins County, and is quite the scandal there.
His father-in-law is a minister of some large Baptist church there, and told his congregation that they would have to take him out of the pulpit if they didn't think the judge was innocent.
He might be looking for another job, soon, too.
Anna Vee Phillips called me last night.  She's always so up-beat and cheerful, asking all types of questions and giving me advice.  She's just an old-time country woman, and has a lot of knowledge about so much around this part of the country.  She lives a little further up on Cherry Street, but not too far from Creekside.  She's an old friend for many years now.
Her daughter-in-law runs Maples Florist in Rutledge.
I need to get off this computer and get to doing some work.